The Beauty in Taking the Longer Route

I took the wrong bus today and it took me a longer time to reach my destination. In our fast paced society where time is money, I could probably do more if I had not taken the longer route. However, instead of being self-critical, I spent the journey admiring the scenery and witnessing some new development in an otherwise unfamiliar territory.

We may go through detours and longer routes in life, because not everything will go accordingly to plan. It doesn't matter because we will eventually reach our destination, despite taking a longer time. The longer route may bring some pleasant surprises for you along the way.

No matter which route you take, always remember to enjoy every bit of the journey. Slow down if you can, Life is meant to be an enjoyable process. Too much stress, living in others' expectations, being over-competitive and end up feeling so unhappy about it will make Life lose it's purpose. The next time u have to take a longer route to reach your milestone, tell yourself that there is beauty in going the extra distance, it is up to you to unravel what's in store for you.

Be Kind to Cleaners & Help Them Fell Good About Themselves

Smile to the office/ toilet cleaners whenever we can, thank those who clear our trays and wipe the tables. This will help to bridge the distance between us and them. Some of these folks may not feel very proud of their jobs and feel inferior about themselves because of what they do. When we are nice to them, we are reassuring them that there is no difference between us and that we can be friends. A job is no more than an income generating tool, it is not to used to establish a caste system on who is more superior or more inferior. Every cleaner is also someone's parent or someone's child, and there is value in the things they do. With kindness, we can help them realise this and make them feel more confident about themselves.

The People Who Hurt Us are there for a Reason

Have we sometimes wished that some people have never come into our lives, especially those who hurt us, heaped misery on us or cheated us? However, these people come into our lives for a reason. Because of their existence, we can better appreciate those who truly care for us and are always there for us.

If we have never experienced the harsh cold winter, we would not have cherished the warm summer months. If we had not scaled the heights of the mountain, we would not have truly appreciated the spectacular view at the top of the mountain. If there is no Monday blues, there would not be weekend/ holiday joys. If there are no mean people in this world, the good and kind people would seem very ordinary.

As our wounds heal, we become stronger, just as how healing from blisters made our skin tougher and less prone to future blisters. Let's not harbour any hate against these people because we will suffer further if we hold onto the negative emotions. If we can't forgive them, then let's just ignore them, move on with life and channel the energy and time to our true friends and loved ones. We will find inner peace and be happier this way.

Receiving Kindness On A Rainy Day

It was raining heavily this morning, so heavy that you will get wet just by alighting from the bus. There was this kind lady who had an umbrella and as she alighted, she turned and offered her umbrella to shelter the rest of the passengers who were alighting. It was a very heartwarming gesture, especially for myself, the recipient of her kindness.

This is the true beauty of kindness, you don't need a reason to give (I am sure she doesn't know any of the passenger she is sheltering), you are also not obliged to give (she could have just walked off and not risked herself getting wet). But you give because you care, you give simply because you want to help someone and by doing so, you make someone's day brighter and happier. Because your action is inspiring, there will be more people giving because of you and this is how our community, our world changes for the better.

The Toothbrush with Hard Bristles

I have a toothbrush that has very hard bristles, so hard that it can cause healthy gums to bleed, when used regularly. I got it free from my previous hotel visits, so it was probably meant to be used for that one or two day of brushing. Instead of dumping it away because it is free and does not serve it's purpose, I use it to wash my kitchen sink and it is now the most trusty cleaning tool that I have. It is especially useful to clean the algae off the sink filter, the gap between the tiles on the kitchen sink top and other areas unreachable by the sponge.

We are just like the toothbrush, not all of us are made to brush teeth and gums. Just because we don't do a good job in brushing teeth, doesn't mean we have no value or any worth at all. It could be that we are made for a greater purpose; using the analogy of the toothbrush with super hard bristles, doing something that most toothbrushes can't do, that is to clean the kitchen sink. Just because we are made differently, doesn't mean we are in any ways inferior to others.

Some school dropouts made it to become millionaires or billionaires, because they choose to focus on what they can do, rather than what they can't do. You may think they are one in a million, but you can also choose to believe that you are also another one in a million. I believe in the potential inside each and every of us, and that we can all make an impact in our respective niche areas and contribute to a better world. Do you?

Don't Let Money Trascend Your Needs to Wants to Greed

You need a 3 room flat, Money gives you a penthouse.
You need a car to travel from one place to another, Money gives you a sports car.
You need a getaway holiday, Money brings you around the world.
You need a meal because you are hungry, Money gives you an international buffet spread.

It is great to have money, but always beware of the power that money has. Money can transcend your needs to wants, then to greed. With greed, people want more and if they don't get what they want, they become unhappy.

Are we unhappy because we are not earning enough to fulfill our needs or we are unhappy because we don't have enough money to fulfill our wants?

Free Things In An Expensive City

Singapore is such an expensive city to live in, everything is costly and our pay could hardly keep up. Is it even possible we could enjoy anything that is free?

The library is an extensive knowledge base for the public to use. There is free aircon and free wifi in the library. Reading from books is better on your eyes than reading from a computer screen. If you don't have enough money to buy books, educational DVDs for your kids, you can loan them from the library.

We have the good old hawker centres to offer you cheap and good food. If you can spend your morning volunteering at Willing Hearts, packing food for needy families, they will provide you with free lunch. I know some temples and mosques also provide free meals for their devotees.

We can spend money on air purifier to get purified air and anions, but there is great abundance of fresh air and negative ions in Nature. We have quite a few nature reserves that allows you to do some simple hiking in Singapore, e.g Mt Faber, MacRitchie Reservoir, Bt Timah, Sungei Buloh. No money for gym membership? Try for a more natural workout in the many parks/ fitness corners in Singapore. Also, the cycling track network is also expanding, you can ride safely while enjoying your workout.

No money for holiday? There are many places of interest that allows you to take decent photos while enjoying some nice attractions. E.g. Supertrees at Gardens By The Bay, Sentosa Island, Singapore Botanic Gardens. There are free concerts sometimes at Esplanade and the nightscape is great at its surrounding areas. The Science Centre offers free admission to Singaporeans/ PR during non-peak hours. Some museums also offer free entry to locals, e.g. National Museum of Singapore.

Rising transport cost? There is free train rides if you exit any of the 18 designated MRT stations by 7.45am on weekdays. There are free shuttle services to Qian Hu, IKEA, IMM, Gain City and Sentosa.

Want to experience a sense of satisfaction? The cost free way is to go declutter your storeroom or the clutters all around the house. Else, try cleaning the sink or bathroom that is filled with algae, you will get that sense of satisfaction when you transform your home from dirty to clean. Another way is to try volunteering and helping people, it is a very rewarding experience.

There are things which are costly but there are also things that are free, we cannot use the expensive items to generalise everything and then be unhappy about it. Just as life can give you reasons to be unhappy, you can life reasons to be happy. It is always possible and you always have a choice, so choose wisely. Cheers :)

What Death Teaches Us About Life

Every now and then, I read about deaths, deaths not just for elderly but also for young children and babies. Death seems such a scary thing, isn't it? Death brings pain, sadness and suffering. But what is more scary than death is to know that you have not truly lived when death is near.

Why do I always advocate being positive and staying happy? It is for the exact reasons that we should treasure life, every day and every moment. Life is short and it could be gone before you knew it. You have time now, it is a privilege and time is something that is denied to many. To spend our time accumulating negative emotions, getting angry with people, revisiting hurt from past incidents, holding resentment, holding onto fears and worries, is wasting away precious moments of our life away.

When the time comes and we look back and realise that we have wasted our life holding onto so much anger, resentment, fears and unhappiness, where we could have done something more constructive and meaningful, we are not going to be proud of it. By then, there is no more time left to change anything, there are only regrets.

If you have not been living the life you always wanted, you still have time to change it for the better, just need to abide to the guiding principles of being positive and happy. Make everyday a happy and good one, aspire to be positive no matter the circumstances you are in. If there is a need to stay from negative influence/ people, have the courage to do so because this is your life, and no one has the rights to dictate what you should or should not do.

Of Salaries & Bonuses

I have some friends who love to compare salaries and bonuses. It started off with curiosity, wanting to know how each other is doing, then becomes envy when they realise they are getting less than the others. The envy then becomes frustration and resentment because they feel that they are not paid what they deserved. Sometimes, the comparison can be across different companies, which I feel makes the comparison more biased. What started off as a happy thing, like receiving a bonus, slowly evolve to be an unhappy thing when we don't find contentment in what we are blessed with.

We are all blessed in different ways, getting less pay or bonus does not mean we are less fortunate than others. If one cannot find contentment, one will never be happy, no matter how much one is given. Some people are big earners but they are also big spenders. Some people are poor but they are happy. Happiness is not a measure of how much we have, but rather how contented we are with what we have :)

Bottling Negative Emotions is as good as Holding on your Pee for hours

Ever had this experience of holding onto your pee for a long time, because you couldn't find a washroom or you were stuck in a long journey? It is definitely not a comfortable feeling to have. Bottling negative emotions has the same effect on your mind as holding your pee.

Say you are angry with someone and your mind automatically repeats all the thoughts on how the person hurt you, your mind gives you reasons to be angry to sustain the anger. End up, the person who suffers the most is yourself, not the person who made you angry. The same goes for other negative emotions you bottle up inside you.

You can bring this state of mind everywhere, to the movies, to a nice dining place but you will never truly enjoy what you are doing. It is like watching an exciting movie with a full bladder. You must find a way to release them.

So, if you are harbouring some negative emotions now, try telling yourself this:
"I acknowledge that I am feeling negative because of certain incident/ people, but I also have the wisdom to know that having these thoughts is not going to help me in any ways. Therefore, I choose to let these thoughts go and shift my focus to something positive and meaningful. I choose to love myself and I deserve to be happy."

I can buy a Clock, but I can't buy Time

I was searching around for a clock and I realised something, I can buy the most beautiful clock or the most expensive clock but I can't buy time. Every hour, every minute and every second that ticked away will not come back to me again. We may think that there is a lot of time left because we are young but the fact is no one knows how much time we have left.

For every minute we wasted doing something that is unconstructive nor beneficial to us, is the one minute we trade to do something that is useful and meaningful to us. For the time we spend bearing grudges, hating someone, getting angry over some people, worrying about something that may not happen, having irrational fears, envying others, playing politics, is the time we could have better spend with our loved ones, doing more for the society, exploring new hobbies, good food, new places of interest (home & abroad) and rejuvenating in Nature.

Every minute is precious, make it count. We are all trading our time for memories, that is one thing that we hold on to until the very last minute, not tons of cash in the bank. If you have not been trading your time wisely for happy memories, now is the good time to start, cheers :)

Introducing "Jason Cai's Motivational Writings"

How many of us have no worries, no insecurities, no fears, no anger, no resentment, no frustrations or no stress in our lives? It seems almost impossible to live a life with no negative emotions, even babies will get angry when they don't get what they want. However, the negative emotions must be kept within the healthy level. If we are starting to feel unmotivated to do anything in life, starting to lose sleep becasue of all the worries and stress, starting to get angry easily, then the negative emotions are obviously overpowering us. We must find ways to either remove some sources of negative emotions or introduce more sources of positive energy in our lives.

In 2013, I started the Project Act of Random Kindness (P.A.R.K.) to encourage more kindness in our society because I strongly feel that we need that. In 2014, I started our kindness group, P2P, to share kindness opportunities and make it easier for friends like yourself to kickstart your kindness journey. In 2015, I started the happiness group, "What Makes Us Happy In Singapore?", to encourage more people to share their happy moments and spread more positive energy around. In 2016, I channelled my time and energy in writing articles to encourage kindness, positivity and happiness. My ebook was launched on Valentine's Day this year and I have just set up a new page, which I boey paiseh call it Jason Cai's Motivational Writings.

I hope that through my thoughts and personal experiences, I can encourage you to adopt a positive attitude in life and in turn make you happier. A happy life is a meaningful life. I am not immune to negative thoughts and emotions but I try my best to manage them as positively as I can, so my writings are reminders to myself too. Also, I find plenty of healing energy in giving kindness and helping people, it is akin to finding a mountain filled with gold. These are all treasures of life which I hope to share with you through my writings. I am not able to take away your source of unhappiness, they are valid by your definition, but I can remind you the reasons of happiness, the blessings that you may have missed when negativity clouds your vision. If you ever feel down, sad, lost or unhappy, I hope my page can encourage you, motivate you, cheer you up and help you find back your zest in life.

This page is not about gaining the most likes, it is about reaching out to helping as many people, as fate and affinity will take us to. It will be my great pleasure if it benefits you in some ways. I hope you can adopt these 3 guiding principles: Be Kind, Be Positive, Be Happy. Cheers :):)

www.facebook.com/jasoncaimotivationalwritings

Make Full Of What You Have To Create a Positive Impact

The rise of terrorism is partly attributed to the evolution led by the Internet, where extremist idealogies get spread across physical boundaries. Is the Internet a bad thing to have? I personally don't think so. The advancement of technology brings about unprecedented changes to our lifestyle and if knowledge is power, the Internet has brought power to our fingertips. How we choose to use this power, whether to do good or bad, is the key to the outcome and impact.

With the Internet, we probably know a particular medical condition before even seeing the doctor, by "googling" the symptoms. We can do a detailed holiday planning even without visiting a country or be reliant on the experience of a tour guide. Because we are all connected on a platform e.g. social media, the appeal for help gets spread around faster and created more awareness. It is very heartwarming to see the community leverage on the Internet to render support for those in need, as seen in many crowdsourcing and fundraising campaigns.

The Internet is a tool that is made possible by the intelligence of men. Just as human intelligence, it must be used wisely to benefit mankind, to justify it's worth and purpose. A knife is a very useful tool in the kitchen, but it can also be a weapon to hurt others. I encourage you to make full use of your gifts, your talents, your strengths and your intelligence, together with all the tools available, to create a positive impact in this world. Be knife that is the prized asset of every chef and homemaker and not rusty knife that is idling in one corner.

Find Reasons To Be Happy When The Going Get Tough

The weather is so hot these days that I enjoy bathing in cold water at night. In times like this, we can really appreciate the invention of aircon :) I am thankful that there is aircon almost everywhere I go, buses, trains, offices, shopping centres, and that made the heat more bearable. There are people who do not have this luxury to work in an air-conditioned environment, e.g. the hawkers, the construction workers, the cleaners or the uniformed groups.

While I don't use the aircon at home, I am thankful that the option to turn on the aircon is available to me. Some people, esp. those staying in rental estates, may not even have a fan at home, not to mention aircon.

The hot weather may get you down or make you feel frustrated easily but you can also find reasons to be thankful and happy. This will take a conscious effort but it is useful to neutralise the negative emotions that may be built up as our environment becomes harsher. Just as Life could throw you tons of problems to handle, being positive will definitely do you a world of good. So, always look on the bright side and focus on the solution, not the problem. Cheers :)

Will We Be Happier If Not In Singapore?

The recent news on parking fees and electricity tariff hike made many Singaporeans unhappy. No matter how justifiable the reasons are for the price increase, Singaporeans will still feel the pinch and this makes us unhappy. So, I wonder, will we be happier elsewhere?

Over the past week, we read about terror attacks happening all over the world, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Bangladesh and even our neighbour, Malaysia, confirmed it's first terror attack. Not long ago, there was mass shooting in USA, also linked to terrorism. Even earlier, bombs went off in Thailand, France. China is currently suffering from flood problems while the Zika virus is still prevalent in South America. If we compare all their issues with our issues, would you choose to swap places with them?

There is a saying that goes like this, if a problem can be solved by money, then it is not a problem. Money concerns are very real because our standard of living is high and we need money to fulfill our basic needs like food, but I dare say no one will die of hunger in Singapore. I said this not from a pro-govt perspective but because I have hugh faith in our fellow Singaporean friends and the amazing work they do.

Let's talk about food, we have a soup kitchen, "Willing Hearts", serving thousands of free meals each day to the underprivileged. My friend, Nizar, is founder of "Free Food For All", if you are hungry and you can approach them for a free meal. As we enjoy our weekend with our loved ones, there are volunteer groups going around door knocking at the rental estates, checking on the residents, young and old. These groups usually follow up with cleaning of houses for those who are unable to do so. There are also many volunteer events organised to distribute groceries to the needy families all over Singapore. From time to time, we see cases of families faced with unfortunate situations being reported in the news and usually there will be an outpour of support from fellow Singaporeans and the social support groups. We see many crowdsourcing campaigns exceed their intended targets, courtesy of the kindness and generosity of our friends in Singapore. All these are living proof we will be there to help one another, should anyone needs some help.

It is easy for me to join in the crowd and complain about our unhappiness. However, my actions will not do you any good and will only serve to make you more negative and feel sorry for yourself. If I really care for you as a friend, let me think of ways on how to make you feel better, instead of worse off. You and I can do a part and make a difference, don't underestimate our ability to do that. Be positive and spread more positive vibes around, help one another whenever you can. We can all contribute to a better community together and have more reasons to be happy :)

Why We Need Monday Blues

The more I try to unravel the mystery of Monday blues and helping everyone, including myself, cope with it, the more I understand the significance of Monday blues and why we need it. Taking away your Monday blues is also taking away your excitement when Friday comes and your joys of the weekend. Sounds like a really bad deal to trade one not-so-happy day for 3 happy days.

We need the blues of Monday to appreciate the beauty of the weekend. It is like if there is no hard work, you will never appreciate the fruit of your labour. If there is no storm, you will not appreciate the sun and the rainbow. If you have not truly given from your heart, you will not understand the joy of giving. If there are no bad days in your life, you will not appreciate the good days.

Monday also symbolises the temporary end of a couple of happy days, that's why we don't look forward to it. We want the good times to last forever, don't we? However, nothing lasts forever, be it the good times or the bad times. The Monday blues happy weekend phenomenon is a reflection of Life; sometimes down sometimes up, when you can tide through Monday and the rest of the week, the good times await you then.

So if you are feeling the blues today, tell yourself this, I am thankful for having Monday blues because it means I love my weekend and I am going to feel excited again when Friday comes.

Wishing all a fabulous week ahead !

Everything Happens For A Reason !

I found this really nice accommodation for my holiday trip and managed to secure the booking online, only to realise that I booked the wrong month. When I tried to amend the booking, I realised that the dates that I should be booking were all taken up already. It seems such a pity because this lodging gathered many good reviews on Tripadvisor but guess what, I later managed to find an even better place, being in a more centralised location with more amenities and best of all, at a cheaper cost (almost half the price).

I may be lucky in this instance but I believe everything happens for a reason in life. When one door closes, the other door opens. Sometimes, not getting what you want may just be the best thing that could happen to you, because something better could be waiting for you. So, don't get upset when things don't go your way, beneath every obstacle/ challenge brings a learning lesson that serves to strengthen you or make you wiser. If you dwell on what do not come your way, you may just miss out on the opportunities to achieve something greater.

Look for the positives in every unpleasant experience. Sometimes, you may not understand why certain things happened or why you meet certain people who annoyed you, but have faith that someday, the reasons will reveal themselves to you. In the meantime, chin up and keep smiling :)