Anger

I was at a bakery to buy some snacks when I left my drink on a table near the cashier counter. Upon receiving payment, the cashier unintentionally knock down my cup and my drink spilled over my shirt and pants. At that immediate instant, I felt quite pissed actually. It was as though being angry was a reflex action when someone did something unpleasant to me. So I asked myself, why was I angry when my drink was spilled? I found a few reasons to justify my anger:

1. The cashier was careless and should have seen the cup
2. The drink was in my opinion overcharged and spilling means I get less
3. I had to walk back a distance to get another drink if the whole cup was spilled
4. I had to wash up as the drink was all over my hands, shirt and pants

However, I think the more critical question I need to ask myself is, how will being angry help to solve the problem? In some situations, being angry and hostile may help a little, esp. if the other side values customer service and is willing to make compensation. However, it does not work all the time. If it doesn't work, will we get even angrier, now that we don't get what we want? By being angry, what am I compromising on? I am actually compromising on my health, physically and emotionally.

In life, we often find many reasons to get angry. We could be angry with our boss, our colleagues, our spouse, our children, our parents, strangers on the street, on the train, angry with the government, angry with high cost of living, angry with what people say on cyberspace and so on. Anger when not managed properly will lead to hate and hate leads to many ugly things. Physically, anger can lead to increased blood pressure, headache, increased anxiety, insomnia and heart problems. Emotionally, anger is a negative emotion and if allowed to grow, will soon become a habit which leads one to get angry easily. The vicious cycle continues as one gets angry easily, does nasty things to others, incites more anger and hate through one's actions. All these while, little is done to solve the problem and a lot of effort and energy is expended on being angry with one another.

I cannot expect anyone to be remain calm at all times but I think we can ask ourselves one simple question when that bout of anger strikes, how does being angry help to solve the problem or change the situation for the better? Or, is it causing more harm than good? Maybe this self-questioning can evoke the logical part of the brain to choose to do the right thing; focus on the solution, not the problem. I leave you with this quote:

“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.”

* Be Kind * Be Happy * Be Positive *