Death & Life

I want to share my thoughts on this taboo topic because I think that if we don't understand about death and why we fear it, we would not have fully appreciated life and cherish it.

Why are we afraid to die or afraid to see our loved ones die? The passing of a loved one is often a very sad experience as it marks the end of our physical relationship with that person. There will no more further opportunities for us to do any physical activities with the loved ones who had departed, we will not see them or talk to them ever again. The same goes for the person who is about to pass on, there is little or almost no opportunities to further interact with his/ her loved ones or do the things that he/ she aspire to. All these fear and sadness revolve around another feeling known as regret. We may regret not spending enough time with our loved ones (our parents, family, friends) when we still have the opportunities. We may regret not having the time to do the things we always wanted to do but instead choose to blindly follow others' definition of a successful life. The more regrets we have, the more we will be sad and afraid of death, because death means you have no more chances to undo all your regrets.

Qn: What are the regrets you foresee you will have when you know you are going to die? You have life now, with life comes opportunities for you to reduce as many regrets as you possibly can. Make full use of these opportunities now.

It is interesting to see many associate "how long one has lived?" to "how well one has lived?". Person A who passed on at the age of 30 have not lived as well as Person B who passed on at the age of 90. I can only agree that Person B had more time and opportunities to live the life he wants but it does not necessarily means that he has lived a more fulfilling life than Person A. If Person A has been living every day to the fullest and doing something which he enjoys and finds meaning in, while Person B is always sad and has no directions or drive in life, then a short and well lived life is definitely better than a long life of worries and emotional suffering.

Qn: Would you rather have a long-lived life or would you rather have a well-lived life? While you may not be able to define the length of life that you have, you can still define the quality of life that you want to live.

The purpose of my sharing is not to tell you that I am not afraid to die. That is totally not true because I fear death like everyone else. However, I am not going to start worrying and get sleepless nights over it. Instead, I want to turn this fear into an energy to propel me further, to appreciate the life that I have and to count all my blessings, to bear less grudges, to get angry less and to let go of many things that I can't control. I want my fear of death to remind me that I am not going to live forever and I am not even sure how much time I have left and because of these reminders, I will treasure every day that I have, for every day is my blessing and my opportunity to change my life or the life of others, for the better. The P.A.R.K journey has been very rewarding thus far but outside this "keyboard warrior" role and away from the computer screen, I am reaping much benefits in my everyday life by being positive. For every message that I send out to you that is embedded with love and positive vibes, I give something back to myself, sometimes just a gentle reminder on how life should be.