The Meaning of True Fortune

The Chinese always want to "huat", especially during Chinese New Year. "Huat" means prosper, have lots of money, wealth and fortune. But do we really understand what is true fortune? Is it all about striking the windfall and having lots of money?

True fortune to me is the ability to spend what you earn, with the people you love, doing what you enjoy most. You may have millions in the bank, but they are not truly yours until you have the chance to spend them. Some people work their health off to accumulate lots of savings but are unable to enjoy due to poor health. Some people have lots of money to travel the world, go to the most beautiful places, but there is no one to enjoy with them. Some people hold high positions at work, receive high pay but are under tremendous stress all the time, even at night. I do not consider all these above mentioned examples as having good fortune and prosperity.

If you have a loving family, some closed friends, your basic needs fulfilled and you have some spare savings for rainy days, you can afford a holiday (even staycation) once in a while and most importantly, you are healthy and able to appreciate good food, beautiful scenery, then I think you are already very blessed and a person with good fortune and prosperity. You can have more, but you may lose even more. Being able to appreciate what we already have, makes us realise the fortune that is already with us.

I wish all my friends a Happy and Prosperous Chinese New Year, may you always be blessed with good health and happiness, as well as the wisdom and courage to choose what is really good for you. Huat Ahh !!

My Most Satisfying Moment

My most satisfying moment came when there was something I thought I couldn't achieve but I did it anyway and it worked.

I have a loved one who is my senior and someone close to me. Her life is filled with so much negativity, she is always worrying, always imagining the worst, getting herself stressed up and losing sleep over the smallest issue. Every time after I counseled her, she felt better but the cycle of negativity returned soon after. The thing about older folks is their unwillingness to break free of decades of old habits and adopt new and positive habits. I felt helpless and ashamed to call my motivational writer when I could not motivate her to be positive and happy. But I still tried to do it anyway.

Recently, we had a long talk and she told me that she felt enlightened and really wanted to cast aside all the thoughts that was causing her unhappiness for so many years, many of them revolving family issues. I thought no harm sending one of my writings to her, though I didnt tell her I wrote them. The correspondance sort of ended there until one night she WA me to tell me she was reading my "long message" over and over again. She was probably troubled by some negative thoughts and couldn't sleep. She told me the mesaage was meaningful and "wonderful" (direct quote from her message). That was a very satisfying moment because she is one person whom I thought I could never influence because of her strong character.

I learnt that every message, every action we sent out with good intent, has an effect on people. We sometimes give ourselves too many reasons to fail, before we even try. If we try and fail, it is still better than not trying at all because not trying is a definite failure.

I hope we can all keep working on our goals, our dreams, keep improving ourselves and make a difference to the lives of other. Even if the results do not present themselves to us immediately, keep the faith that the our actions will bear fruits someday.

No Festive Mood, Never Mind !

I am in this situation whereby colleagues and friends around me are in festive mood while I am under pressure to deliver my work in a very tight project schedule. Late lunch, quick lunch, OTs, work stress, are all becoming common.

Should I feel sorry for myself? Should I blame my boss for all the pressure and tight deadline? Or maybe I should get angry with the colleagues who are taking their time to respond to my urgent requests?

Will doing all these help me? No. On the contrary, it only serves to make me more negative, build more resentment towards everyone and indulge in self pity, which is neither helpful nor meaningful.

If you see from an organisational perspective, there is no such thing as expecting less work during festive season, because we don't receive less pay during these periods as well. If we get less work, then it is a blessing, if not, it is normal. There are many people who had to work through the Chinese New Year, so I am definitely more fortunate than them.

In this festive season, I am thankful for good health, thankful that my loved ones are well, thankful that I have enough for myself and my family, thankful that I am surrounded by the wonderful people. And that, is all it matters, isn't it?

Thankful For the Sheltered Walkway During Heavy Rain

On a Monday morning when it is raining so heavily, I am thankful for one thing: sheltered walkway. While I may take a longer route to the train station, the sheltered walkway kept me dry and safe, as I probably be wet even I carry an umbrella walking on the street.

Stay dry and be safe, my dear friends & have a fantastic week ahead ! Every day is a gift, a blessing and an opportunity to change for the better, make it count, cheers :)

When You Are Feeling Inadequate

When you think that your spouse is not sensitive enough, not loving enough, not taking initiatives, someone out there could be suffering from abuse issues in their marriage.

When you think that your kids are not smart enough or taking care of them is draining all your time and energy, some parents out there could be struggling to care for a special needs child, some parents could be coping with the loss of their child and some couples could be having problems conceiving.

When you think that you that your parents are always nagging, over protective and controlling, there are many out there who grew up without parents' love, some have not even seen their parents before.

When you think that your work is overwhelming and your boss is being unreasonable, someone out there could be hoping that they can get a shot for interview at your company.

When you envy the people living in private property and driving posh cars, someone out there may just wish they have a shelter over their head, a nice comfortable bed and uninterrupted supply of electricity, water and gas, just like what you have now.

When you wish that you could travel the world like an adventurer, someone out there may just wish that they have a healthy and abled body, just like you, to do the simple things in life with their loved ones.
When you think that living in Singapore is so tough, so stressful, so boring, someone out there in the poorer developing nations or someone living in the war zones, may have wished that they were born here, because their fates would be significantly different.

When you think that your life is tough, someone out there could have wished that they are living your life instead of theirs.

Unhappiness usually revolve around comparison with others who are better off than us, while contentment comes from seeing the blessings we already have.

When we can do a shift in mindset from seeing what we don't have or unhappy with to seeing what we have and are happy with, we have reached another level of enlightenment. To get there takes practices, it takes courage to break free of old habits, it requires determination but yet after going through the process of change, you find that it is all so worth it.

Counting My Blessing On A Weekend Morning

Every weekend morning, as I laze on my bed, deciding whether to get up or not, I count my blessings.

This comfortable bed, together with clean bedsheet, pillow and bloster is a privilege denied to some fellow Singaporeans, e.g. the needy elderly who have difficulties cleaning their own sleeping environment, due to health reasons. There are also poor families who couldn't afford a proper bed, some of these families have young children sharing a single mattress. Because I have so much more than them, I am the lucky one.

As I sleep till late morning, there are many people already hard at work, those in the service line, those in F&B, weekend to them is just another working day because there will be no income if they choose not to work. Or simply, their job scope requires them to work on weekend and public holidays.

Life can be quite challenging but yet in some aspect, we are still better off than some and being able to recognise that, instead of feeling sorry for our plight, is the key to happiness. With a happy life, there is room for greater things, like giving kindness and making a difference to the community. Life becomes more meaningful this way.

Wishing all a happy and blessed weekend ahead !

Some Things Never Age With Time

25 years ago, my favourite fish burger at the coffeeshop western food stall cost $2.

Now, the western food stall under my block also sells fish burger at $2.

25 years ago, my parents taught me about kindness and what it is like to help people.

Now, I am spreading the kindness message and encouraging people to help one another.

Today, we face many challenges; rising costs of living, greying population, high property prices and overwhelming workload in office.

But, didn't our parents and their generation also face many challenges 25 years ago, while building up Singapore, and building up their families?

If they can do it, so can we !

And we will do it better, let's believe that and keep the faith that we will overcome the challenges and come out of them stronger.

Give Love During the Festive Season

The RC under my block is collecting donation of rice and canned food for needy elderly and poor families. Just nice I have canned food and a packet of 1kg jasmine rice.

I don't really take canned food because I think they are unhealthy. I know I am blessed because I can still afford to choose, when that can of food could satisfy a meal for a needy family.
I thought that it doesn't have to stop here. I can give a little bit more, so I bought another 5kg of jasmine rice as part of the donation. The rice may not cost a lot to me, but they can mean a lot to the beneficiaries.

When times are bad, we need more people, those who are more fortunate, to give a little bit more, to help those who are struggling. We give one another Hope through our actions. That is how our society can progress and we can all prosper together. It all starts with a thought, which then translates to an act of kindness and soon influencing people around us and eventually making this a culture.

Chinese New Year celebrates reunion, health and prosperity. As we wish our loved ones well, let's also keep up the good spirit and spread some love to those who are less fortunate in our community.

Counting My Blessing After Meeting A Needy Elderly

Was lunching at a hawker centre when an old Auntie approached and ask me for money. At first thought, I didn't know if she was really needy or not but seeing her old age and walking with a walking stick, I decided to pass her a $5 note. She was delighted and kept thanking me.

She then sat beside me and started sharing her story. She mentioned that she was 80 years old and her husband passed away 5 years ago. She had 2 daughters who never visited her. She has heart problems and the bills were taxing. I asked if she had monthly allowance from comcare/ MSF and the benefits from the pioneer generation card. Apparently, she has all of them but minus the bills and rental, it was not much left. She mentioned that if she has extra money, she would help those who are less privileged than her. As we chatted, we broke the wall between us and I asked if she liked to have lunch, as I can buy for her, but she mentioned she will have it later as she needed a rest.

I think for someone like her, who had lived 80 years, to lower her dignity and come out asking for money must not be an easy thing. I am glad that with a small token, I made an elderly happy today. I still urge caution though, esp. when it comes to money matters. I think we should also appreciate what we have now, our health, our loved ones and the ability to fill our stomach when we are hungry.

The Gratitude Exercise

Dear Friends,

I want to do this simple exercise with you because I think it will benefit you. List down 5 things you are grateful for. You don't have to comment but at least tell yourself the 5 things that you are grateful for. It will help in shifting your mind off the things in everyday life that you are unhappy with.

For me, I am simply grateful for so many things, the very fact that I am able to see, to read, to type and to be connected with wonderful people like yourself. Thank you for always being so supportive and pls do this simple exercise, cheers :)

Are You A Success Story? "Yes" or "Not Yet"

Are you a success story?

You have 2 choices; "Yes" or "Not Yet".

"No" is not an option.

When I say success, I do not mean having lots of money, having expensive houses, cars or holding high positions, because you can be having all of these but still feeling unhappy or negative.

Success means unleashing your potential to create a positive impact in this world and in turn finding joy and satisfaction in doing so. Have your actions touch lives and influence people to want to be better persons? Have you use what you are strong at to bring values to the people around you? Have you lived Life passionately, knowing there is so much more wanting for you to achieve? Has your life been happy and meaningful?

I believe we are all meant to be success stories. Don't let society norms and comparison with others blind your vision of what you can and should be achieving. Don't let situations you are born in define your fate in life. Even if you are born in the most underprivileged family, if you believe you can succeed, you will ! Don't play the blame game when you are not finding success because the one person who can make or break you is........YOU !

You are meant to be a success story, never ever stop believing in that. Cheers :)

Great Leaders Inspire More Leaders

A good leader has many followers but a great leader turns many followers into leaders. If you have the gift to lead, inspire those who follow you to realise their potential and become leaders too. The world needs more people to step out and lead good causes to benefit everyone. Don't stop at building your own legacy, make people believe they can be great too, cheers 

Having Late Lunch But Feeling Thankful

Had a long meeting this morning from 9plus all the way to 2 plus. Before my mind starts to think negatively and starts to play the blame game (blame the boss, blame the organization or even blame living in Singapore), I am thankful for a few things.

I am thankful I am able to grab food, a bowl of hot noodles, quickly after my meeting at my company canteen. In my old office location, the small canteen would have closed already and the nearest eatery probably take another 10mins of travel.

I am thankful I only experience long meeting hours once in a while. I know there are many who skipped lunch or dinners regularly because of work, which I strongly discouraged.

I am also thankful that all my life, I rarely miss any meal in a day. I know there are poor people, even in Singapore, who survived on just a meal a day.

I know I am blessed with good health and could still afford to eat at a later timing, while some people with health conditions, like gastric pain or diabetes, couldn't.

Now what is it I want to say about my boss, organisation or country? It doesn't matter because Life is good to me, as I learn to see the positives in every situation.