The Secrets of My Tuition Success

I take on tuition assignments every now and then, as a means to earn some pocket money when I was studying and to supplement my main income after I started working. There are two students who are worth mentioning because I helped improve their grades drastically from a 'F' grade to a decent 'A' or 'B' grade. I achieved this through my "teaching formula", which amazingly is still working despite teaching the two students 10 years apart. Today I will share with you this set of principles, in hope that you can help yourself/ your child achieve academic improvement, even without engaging a private tutor. This is my act of kindness to all Singaporean students/ parents :)


Background

Student A:
In year 2003, I took on a tuition assignment to coach a Sec 4 'O' Levels student, who was very weak in Pure Physics. I had less than half a year to help him prepare for his 'O' Levels as I only received the assignment around May/ June period, while his 'O' Levels exams were around October. His Physics grade eventually improved from a 'F9' (Mid Term Exams) grade to a 'B3' grade ('O' Levels Exams).

Student B:
Earlier this year (2013), I received an assignment to teach a Sec 4 'N(A)' Levels student, who was very weak in Combined Science (Physics/ Chemistry) and Maths. Similarly, I had less than half a year to prepare him for the 3 subjects because I took on the assignment around Mid April and his last paper was on Mid October. His grades improved from 'F9' for both subjects to 'A2' for Maths and 'B4' for Combined Science in his N(A) Levels Exams. Due to his good grades, he is allowed direct entry into Polytechnic and thus skipped a year of not requiring to study Secondary 5 and taking 'O' Levels.


Tuition Principles

My tuition formula is based on 5 key principles and they are as follow:

1. Motivation
The first guiding principle is motivation. A student without motivation for studying is akin to an employee doing a job that is not to his/ her interest. Without motivation, a student will just be going through motion and study for the sake of studying. I tried to instill motivation in my student by giving them encouragement when they do well and explaining to them the true purpose of education, that is to equip us with useful knowledge, that might be applicable in our everyday life. I highlight their strength, to make them feel confident of their abilities because they will be more motivated to study when they develop more self-confidence. At times when the student is losing motivation, I work with the parents to see how best we can motivate the child. The parents have spent years nurturing the child so they know best how to motivate their child. If the student is motivated to study and improve, half the battle is already won.

2. Foundation
This is the part which caused many students to struggle in the later part of their study curriculum, especially when they are nearing the major examinations. We must understand that any structure that is built upon a weak foundation is prone to collapse. Therefore, I always believe that we need to painstakingly build the foundation in any subjects before moving on to other things. I will not let my student practise assessment questions without getting their foundation right because it is a waste of time, they will not likely to do well for those questions too. For major examinations like 'O', 'N' or 'A' Levels, the curriculum usually spans across two years. Some students may just do enough to get pass the first year but when syllabus gets more difficult, they find themselves in a pool of doubts because their foundation in the subject is not strong. Besides engaging a private tutor to explain these concepts, students can do their due diligence in clarifying concepts that they are unclear with their school teachers.

3. Hard Work
Thomas Edison once said that "Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. I strongly believe that hard work is the key to success in any area of work. No matter how smart a student can be, if he don't put in the effort to study, he will not score as well as he puts in the effort to study. This gets more true as we progress in our education journey (If you don't believe, try not studying for your modules in your undergrad studies). I always encourage my students to do two things; summary notes and mindmaps. I believe reading through the textbook is not enough to make you understand and remember. When you put the pen to the paper, you gain a better understanding because you break down paragraphs of text into point form. Also, these notes will be useful as it facilitates easy revision and reference the next time round (just imagine you have to comb through your thick textbook for reference or revision). Mindmap is a good way of giving a pictorial overview of a chapter and will be useful for last minute revision, especially hours before the examinations. You certainly don't want to carry your thick textbooks to examination venue, let alone browse through them for any last minute revision.

4. Plan Ahead
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. I advocate that my students have their own study timetable and it must be planned far ahead, say 2 months before a major examination like Prelims or the 'O' Levels. The study timetable will give a guide on what subjects to study, how many hours, what are the topics to study for a particular day. It can be vague as to what subjects to study on that day or it can be as detailed as the chapters to study, the time allocated for each chapter. The idea is to ensure that all subjects are covered and there is sufficient time allocated to study every subject. Planning ahead means that you do not leave everything to the last minute, which will add on to your stress if you find yourself having to cope with too many subjects. I did study plan from Secondary school all the way to University and they always give me the reassurance that things are under control.

5. Practice Makes Perfect
Once a student is motivated, has got the foundations right, the difference between passing and scoring lies in the amount of practice he/ she has. I like my students to finish all the papers in the Ten Years Series (TYS) at least once. It will be good if they can do a few more rounds. The student with the greatest determination to do well will stop at nothing, he/ she will do the TYS a few times, go through his/ her Prelims papers, try to practise other school Prelims papers and so on. The more a student practises, the more confident the student gets. Another key point would be to practise under exam condition, i.e. if the student is only allowed 2 hours for a paper, he will time himself and make sure that he stop writing after 2 hours. After which, he will be able to gauge if he is too fast (may be more prone to carelessness) or too slow (need to speed up else questions not attempted will get zero marks) and fine tune accordingly with more practice. I also encourage my students to bring a watch or a small clock to examination hall, so that he/ she can keep track of the time during the examinations.

There you have it, all the secrets of my tuition and academic success are listed above. I hope it is useful and can help you/ your child in your/ your child's education journey. If you have the gift of being a cut above the rest, please be generous to help your friends along. We don't have to keep everything to ourselves because that type of behavior will make us more selfish and will not make our world a better place. Helping your fellow friends with their studies is a way of reinforcing your concepts and you may even find out what you don't know as you guide someone along. The bottomline is, be kind and be generous to share your knowledge. What you achieve will definitely be more satisfying! 

The 7 Secrets of Happiness

One of my friends is writing a book featuring short stories of happiness and thus looking for people to share their thoughts and experience on attaining happiness in their everyday lives. These are the 7 pointers that I shared with her, based on my reflection and personal experience:

1. Count your blessings.
When we are thankful for what we are blessed with in life, we will be happy. On the other hand, people are unhappy because they are deprived of something, be it material possession like money or emotional attachment like friendship, love and kinship. For me, I am thankful for my family, my friends, my health, my job and even this very day that I am alive. I am thankful for being to be able to be born in Singapore where we are free from the natural disasters. I am thankful that my hard work in my studies are paid off with a stable and well paying job. I am thankful to be able to do many things I enjoy, which includes eating good food, watching nice movies and spending time with my family members. I am thankful that I am able to travel to other countries for holiday trips and learn more about different cultures and lifestyle. I am thankful to meet good people who inspire me to do more for this world. I am thankful for all the help, advice and guidance that people have given me throughout my life. I am thankful to be given the opportunities to make a difference to the lives of others. Lastly, I am thankful to be reminded once in a while on how blessed and fortunate a person I am.

2. Spreading happiness to others.
I have learned from a young age that bringing happiness to others is one of the best form of gaining happiness for myself. Whenever I am able to help someone or make someone happy, I feel happy too. It is this belief that propel in me to reaching out to help the less fortunate. Through participating in volunteer work during my studies, I learned that helping others can be a very meaningful and fulfilling thing to do. When I graduated from school, I am bogged down by my commitment in work and personal life. However, this does not mean that we stop helping or giving happiness to others. There are still many ways to give happiness to others and that is why I am advocating that we engage in acts of kindness for others. This is especially targeted to friends who want to do good but are very busy to participate in volunteer work. We can all engage in acts of kindness because an act of kindness is easy to do and does not take much time to complete. When we give kindness to people and make their day, we will feel the happiness inside us too. Helping others, making another person happy are all acts of kindness. Again, I am thankful to discover one of the secrets of happiness, that is to bring kindness to others and lend a helping hand whenever possible.

3. Do not be obsessed with material desires
I have to say that money is important because the cost of living in Singapore is rather high but we should be too obsessed with making money. The society defines success as the person who drives luxury cars, own luxury apartment, wear branded from head to toe and has lots of cash in the bank. However, before we aspire to reach that "successful" level, we should ask ourselves this, "Will we be happier if we have the big cars, the houses and the money?" The question is not will we be happy but will we be happier, much happier if we have all these material possessions? If we are already happy with what we have, should we still strive towards this target and make ourselves unhappy if we don't accomplish our goals? The pursuit of the material desires is never ending and often people who are chasing this dream get sucked into a vicious cycle of greed and unhappiness. When we achieve our first million dollars, we want more, we are unhappy with one million dollars so we set the next target of two million dollars. When we have two million dollars, we think how nice would it be if we have three million dollars. The greed of human nature will keep us wanting for more. In the end, we will never be happy because what we have is always never enough to satisfy our wants. The question boils down to how much do we really need. If we only need ten thousand dollars, why do we want to set a high target of one million dollars? I believe in fulfilling our basic needs and setting a contingency sum for rainy days, the rest of our time and effort can be spent on doing something more meaningful. Also, people barely remember you for how rich you are because there will always be someone richer out there. The best gift that we can pass to others is the happy memories we created for them, the moments we touch their lives with kindness and love, not how much money we have given them.

4. Don't compare yourself with others.
I feel that people will be unhappy if they compare themselves to others who are better off in some aspect. We can admire someone for their talents but should not make ourselves any worse off by measuring up against them. We must be ourselves and love ourselves for who we are and not be unhappy with what we don't have or are not. It is easy to be envy that someone has a job that is more well paid and less stressful, having a spouse who is more attractive or rich parents who can splurge on them, but bear in mind that no one is perfect or leads a perfect life. What we are seeing may only be the superficial side of things but they could have their issues in life to deal with. By comparing ourselves with people who are better off in some ways, we are making ourselves unhappy. You never know that the same person might envy you for something that he/ she doesn't have. The way to find happiness is to be happy with what you already have and make the best out of it. Not comparing with others saves us much worries and unhappiness.

5. Be positive
Staying positive about life is one of the most important attitude that one must have to be happy. The obstacles and issues in life can make or break you, it really depends on how you see them and how much you want to learn from them. Being positive means that you can focus on the solution rather than the problem and you will solve the problem faster instead of approaching it with a negative mindset. Waking up every morning for work can be a dreadful feeling but it can also be a happy feeling for the positive person who feels blessed to be given another day to do the things that he/ she enjoys. When the going gets tough, it is important to approach issues with a positive mindset because negativity breed more negativity and vice versa.

6. Have a purpose in life
We should aspire to find our purpose in life and live life to the fullest. The saddest thing that can happen is to look back when we are in our old age and have regrets about the things we should have done when we have the chance, time and energy to do so. Also, we should not going through motion in life; studies, work, career, family planning, retirement are what most people go through and it seems like that is how life should be. However, while going through these stages in life, we have to find meaning and fulfillment in the things we do, otherwise we are really doing it for the sake of doing or following what others define as the norm. I can be going through these stages happily if I find meaning and purpose in the things I do while I can drag my feet through these stages because I do not find any significant purpose in doing the things that others think I should be doing.

7. Love yourself
There is time to work hard and there is time for rewards. Loving oneself is as important as loving others. If we are hard on ourselves and can't bear to spend any money to reward ourselves, then we can't be happy. I am not advocating the other extreme of splurging but we should love ourselves more and give ourselves a good treat every now and then. Some ways of loving oneself include buying yourself a nice gift, treating yourself to good food and engaging in enjoyable activities like going on a holiday, never mind the money spent but to keep the activities in moderation. The miser may be happy that he is accumulating a lot of money in the bank but he is likely to lead an unhappy life if he watches every spending closely, to the extent of sacrificing his happiness just to save up the money. Other than spending the money to pamper ourselves, it doesn't harm to remind ourselves once in a while that we are proud of who we are because we have worked hard, helped others and are useful members of the society.

Update of My Kindness Diary

It has been almost 2.5 months since PARK started on 22 September 2013 and I am really thankful for all the support and positive responses that our kind friends have given us. Thank you for all the likes on our Facebook Page for the articles, quotes and photos posted. Thank you guys for coming on board the ARK as we sail along this lifelong voyage of spreading kindness to anyone who needs it, and making the world a better place for everyone to live in.

I would like to share with you some of the acts of kindness that I have done since my last update. Hopefully, they provide good reference to you and can inspire you to do an act or two:

• Gave words of encouragement to a friend who was feeling down
• Reminded someone that he had forgotten about his umbrella as he was leaving
• Helped an auntie picked up her purse after she dropped it
• Helped a couple take a photo
• Returned trays and plates after consuming my meals
• Gave my friends a treat over breakfast
• Helped a family take a group photo
• Offered my last piece of tissue to a friend
• Offered to top up drinks for my friends
• Volunteered to take on some ad hoc duties to help out in a running event
• Held the door for my friends to enter a room first
• Shared my food with a friend
• Helped a friend make some DIY cushions for his shoes using tissue paper as he was having abrasion on his ankle
• Gave my seat to a lady so she could sit with her daughter
• Brought a family member for shopping despite feeling unwell
• Donated money to help Typhoon Haiyan victims
• Helped to grab the attention of the cashier for a lady who was seeking help
• Allowed someone to exit the station first after she was stuck waiting the queue to clear
• Donated extra money to a charity organization selling greeting cards when making payment
• Chipped in some money for a colleague who fell sick
• Bought tissue paper from an intellectually disabled man and gave him extra money
• Gave directions to someone in the train station
• Provided information to a visually impaired man on the bus
• Gave advice and guidance to a fellow colleague
• Helped a family member make copies of a travel video
• Offered advice to a family member on relationship issues
• Wrote a letter of compliment for a friend
• Made space for more passengers to board in a crowded last train
• Pressed the lift open button for other passengers to exit the lift first
• Took a leaflet from a lady handing out leaflets in the MRT station to lessen her workload
• Raised awareness for ongoing initiative and charitable drives
• Encouraged my family member to save the snails which crawled out of the grass patch but putting them back into the grass patch

I always believed that giving kindness can change someone who received our kindness for the better. I come to realize that, at the same time, giving kindness is also changing ourselves for the better.

Dealing with Unkind People

I like to share 2 unpleasant incidents and my thoughts on them. The first incident happened when I asked a shopkeeper on where to locate a particular product and she answered in a very impatient and rude manner. The 2nd incident happened when I was in the lift with some neighbors living in the same block. The lift door opened before the ground level and a little boy ran out. A kind man chased after him and brought him back. I thought it would be nice to move in a little so that they have space to come into the lift. I did not realize I was invading into the space of an elderly lady and she got irritated by that and started ranting at me. The mother of the boy, who knew the elderly lady, tried to explained that I did not realize her presence and the lift was crowded. That did not stop her as she continued venting her frustration until we reached ground level.

My initial reactions to both incidents were negative and defensive. An instinctive part of me wanted to get even with them because I thought that I was totally undeserving of such treatment, especially when I have done nothing wrong to them. However, in both occasions, I chose to calm myself down and move away and then move on. I feel that sometimes, the best reaction to any form of negativity is to ignore them and not try to get even. This is because by into any argument/ disputes/ quarrels with these angry folks, we are sucked into the vicious cycle of negativity. Soon, we will be hurling abuse to one another and make our day even more miserable. After that, we tend to share this unhappy experience with our friends, loved ones, and when we do so, we refresh our memory on the confrontation again, reminding ourselves of the unhappiness and making us feel angry and unhappy again. When this becomes a habit, we get sucked into another vicious cycle whenever someone did something unpleasant to us.

I feel that a better approach is to ignore these people who are unkind to us and not get into any confrontation with them. When we move away and calm ourselves down, we can better understand why some people react in a certain way. For the shopkeeper who was rude, she could be having a bad day and the weather was really hot that day so it might have contributed to her bad mood. For the elderly lady who was reacting very negatively, she could be overly concerned about protecting her health (physical) and wanted to prevent an incident from happening, e.g. me stepping on her toes. Whatever the case, not reacting to the negativity stops the negativity there, it does not evolve into something more unpleasant. Also, not reacting is not a sign of weakness or cowardice, it is sign of sensibility and maturity. We cannot control how others think or how others react, but we certainly can control how we think or react to their actions. Understanding this fact makes a world of difference.

Lastly, these 2 incidents did not affect me much because I choose not to let them affect me negatively. They did not derail my motivation to spread kindness and influence others to do good. In fact, I am more determined to do so after these incidents because it is evident that kindness is clearly lacking in some ways. If we can show more kindness to others, perhaps we will be more patient and tolerant towards others, even when we feel intruded in some ways. If we choose kindness over getting even with others, we are likely to feel happier and achieve inner peace. Don't focus on the negativity, move on, be kind and help others, you definitely will feel better than dwelling on the unhappy stuff.

We can all lead a happier life, the choice is ours.

The Kindness Superhero in You

I am sure most people around us are generally kind and have done many kind acts in their lives. When someone approach them for help, they are most likely willing to help you out. This group of people belongs to the "Reactive Kindness Giver", i.e. whenever they are called upon, they will offer kindness to anyone in need.

There is another group of people who is known as the "Proactive Kindness Giver". They proactively look for kindness opportunities and will offer their time, effort and energy to engage in acts of kindness even when they are not called upon. They are likely to take the initiate to improve things and go the extra mile to make life better for others. The proactive kindness giver will lead by example and inspire others to proactively give kindness through the amazing things they have done.

Through PARK, I hope that we can convert more "Reactive Kindness Givers" to become "Proactive Kindness Givers". The world needs people to take the lead, be role models so that others can follow their inspiring examples to give more kindness. If there is no one leading by example, the whole kindness movement will collapse. We need to read about inspiring kindness stories, learn of amazing people who go all out to make the world a better place through their kindness. The world needs a Kindness Superhero and that person could be you.

Each of everyone of us can be a Kindness Superhero and change lives through our actions. All we need to do is to believe in that and be a Proactive Kindness Giver. We can make the world a better place to live in, through acts of random kindness, one at a time. Be someone's Superhero today, the sense of satisfaction you get will be the greatest feeling you have experienced.

Planting the Seed of Kindness

While I aspire to encourage people around me to engage in acts of random kindness, I do not define for them what is an act of kindness. Neither do I come out with a "Top 1000 Acts of Kindness" manual for anyone to follow. I believe this is totally unnecessary because kindness can come in any forms, at any place or happen any time. What I hope to achieve is to influence people to embrace kindness in their heart because when they do so, the opportunities to be kind are limitless. My friends, I hope you can plant this seed of kindness in your heart and nurture it regularly with more acts of kindness and soon it will grow into a strong tree of kindness. You will be amazed by how much kindness you can give when you let the kindness in your heart lead the way.

I would like to share this article on inspiring acts of kindness, whereby Loga and his friends came together to raise funds for need families so that these folks can have a very special festive celebration. With the money gathered, they bought festive goodies, simple deco and gave Ang Pows to the needy families. Initially, they had wanted to reach out to 20 families by raising $2,000. However, within 16 hours of appeal, the group of friends received almost $10,000 in donation and kind from family, friends and good-hearted Samaritans. Therefore, Loga and his friends reached out to 70 families by distributing festive packs and gave out $50 cash/ voucher per family island wide. Their amazing acts of kindness and volunteerism did not stop there because they helped to clean several homes and bought 28 pairs of shoes for boys from Ramakrishna Boys Home. If we want to see how far kindness can bring us to, this is a perfect example.

Thumbs Up for all the acts of kindness and Great Work Guys! You have made all your loved ones proud of you.

[Sneak Preview] P.A.R.K. Kindness Day

I hope to realize this initiative called P.A.R.K. Kindness Day some time next year, maybe on the first anniversary of P.A.R.K. (22 September 2014) or even earlier if we manage to gather enough support for this event. On P.A.R.K Kindness Day, I would like anyone who believes in P.A.R.K. to come together to make a (minimum) contribution of $1 to any charities or non-profit organizations supporting a good cause, of their choice. There are a number of ways to donate to charities, be it through Flag Day on the street or via the online donation portal, SG Gives, which supports up to 270 charities.

This is certainly a good way to show kindness to those who need our help most as every dollar donated can make a difference to the lives of the poor and needy. I hope that all our friends who believes in P.A.R.K. can come together and support this event together. I am sure that if you are reading this post, $1 doesn't really make much of a difference to you. However, if we have many friends contributing $1 each, say 1000 of us, we would have raised $1,000 for charity.

Lastly, I hope that those who have supported this event can PM me how much they donated and to which organization so that I can consolidate the total amount that P.A.R.K. Kindness Day has generated for the charities. Alternatively, they can post this piece of information on our Facebook Page. If this event is successful, we can have more of such initiatives in the future and we will keep adding to the previous total we have collected. I believe all our P.A.R.K. members would be really proud to have contributed to this amount in some way.

Nation Of Kindness

Being a Gen Y member when most of our fellow peers are well educated and drawing a decent pay, we sometimes neglect to acknowledge the existence of the poor and needy in our society. This is because when we look around us, we realize that most, if not all, of our friends seem to be doing quite well. Most of our friends are holding a diploma/ degree and having office jobs so life can't be that bad. However, just because we don't have friends who are poor and needy, it does not mean that there are no poor or needy around.

The income gap between the poor and the rich is widening and those who are earning considerably less will be swept behind by the tsunami of inflation and high cost of living. Some may think that it is the government's job to take care of the poor and needy, but can we as fellow citizens do more? Some may ask why should we even bother. It is better to work hard and save the money for myself, never mind who is suffering out there. Then again, we should try to eradicate this kind of "I only care for myself" mindset if we really want to progress as a society and more importantly as a person.

We should care for each other because we are all members of the society and citizens of the same country. If it is within our means, we should try to do something to help these group of friends, so that everyone moves along and the society progress together, leaving no one behind. If Singapore were to go to war one day (touch wood), are we going to segregate the poor and the rich? No! We are going fight as one army and we are going to defend our country together. If we are not caring and helping each other now, how are we going to have that trust and team spirit when the crunch time comes?

When the poor gets poorer, they will be ones who suffer most, as their pay is unable to catch up with inflation. There's a recent article which states that the "working poor" (someone whose income per household capita is less than half of the national median per capita household income of Singapore, which stands at $1,920) are not getting enough pay to make ends meet. The government may come out with policies to help them but it may still be a struggle for them. Can we be kind enough to do a bit more for them and lighten their load?

80 Kind Acts in 1 Month, Fact or Myth?

It has been almost a month since P.A.R.K started on 22 September 2013. I have recorded down my kind acts, not to boast how kind I am, but to share and encourage others to do likewise. It is not difficult to engage in acts of kindness when we set our heart to do it. Otherwise, I would not be able to complete 80 acts of kindness in less than a month. I would encourage everyone to share your acts of kindness because there is nothing ashamed about telling others the good you have done. If one can share photos of their luxury car, expensive holidays or high priced property, why can't one share acts of kindness, which is priceless?

Also, I would encourage everyone to record down their P.A.R.K moments (acts of kindness) because you should be proud of yourself for being kind. It takes a big heart to give kindness so you deserve some credit for doing a kind deed. When you reflect on life someday and ask yourself what you have achieved in this life, this record will be your biggest supporting proof that you have lived a meaningful and purposeful life.

Here's sharing with some acts of kindness (some are repeated) that I have done for the past month, hopefully you can be inspired to do one or two in the coming weeks:

PARK Moments on Public Transport
Giving up my seat in public transport to someone more needy
Letting someone more needy to an available empty seat in the MRT
Pressing the lift open button for other passengers to exit the lift first in the MRT station

PARK Moments for Friends
Gave my friends a treat
Preparing a birthday gift for a friend
Showed concerns for a friend and gave him advice on the issues he faced
Cleaned dirty chairs in a hawker center so that my friends won't sit on them later

PARK Moments for Charity
Bought tissues from a frail old auntie
Made a donation to charity (Flag Day)
Made a donation to a non-profit organization (Wikipedia)
Supported the bread donation drive organized by Singapore Kindness Movement (SKM) & Gardenia
Promoted the bread donation drive to encourage more friends to do their part for charity and embrace kindness in their lives.

PARK Moments for Colleagues
Sharing useful knowledge with fellow colleagues
Refill the blank paper supply for my company's printer
Flushing the toilet in office for someone who forgot to flush before me

PARK Moments for Family
Bought something for my family members
Prepared a nice meal for my family members
Bought a small gift to cheer up a family member
Gave advice to a family member on career switch
Gave praise to a family member for spreading kindness
Encouraged my family members to do their part for charity

PARK Moments for PARK
Pass compliments to PARK Star Award Winners
Sharing quotes of kindness on PARK Facebook page
Blogging for P.A.R.K. to share my thoughts and experience on giving kindness, to encourage more people to embrace kindness for life

PARK Moments for the Online Community
Helping to answer questions on Yahoo Answers and received numerous "Best Answers" award

PARK Moments for Service Providers
Gave a cobbler extra tips for excellent service and good workmanship

PARK Moments for the Neighborhood
Pressed the lift open button for my neighbors to exit first

As you can see, no acts of kindness is insignificant or wasted as it made a difference in the lives of others. Some acts of kindness can help to brighten up someone's day, some acts of kindness can bridge relationships, some act of kindness can provide hope to those in despair, some acts of kindness can impact others living in different parts of the world, some acts of kindness can help the less fortunate in society, some acts of kindness encourage someone to do his job better, some acts of kindness result in more acts of kindness. If you are still wondering if what you do will really make a difference, now is the time to think again. Start with just one act of kindness today, you will be inspired to do more acts of kindness in time to come.

P.A.R.K.'s Vision & Mission

My vision for P.A.R.K. is that we can create a community full of kind people, whereby everyone is generous in giving, not shy to share their acts of kindness and thus inspiring more people to embrace kindness as a way of life. When we truly care about others more than our own interest, our society will progress as a whole.

Kindness is a big umbrella which encompasses all the good things about humanity. With kindness, you will want to do something more, go the extra mile for someone and then be inspired to lead new projects that can impact the world in different ways. When you embrace kindness in your heart, opportunities will present themselves to you. There is no greater secret to happiness, this is it, kindness is the key to unlock the treasure box of happiness that you truly deserves.

For all our dear friends who have come on board the ARK, I wish to express my heartfelt gratitude and appreciation to you for believing in this project. Each and everyone of you is very important to P.A.R.K., you are our ambassador of kindness and we need you to lead by example and show others how easy it is to engage in acts of random kindness. Never stop believing in the power you have in your hands, you can all change the world, through acts of random kindness, one at at time.

PARKing in the Hawker Center

I have a PARK moment today which I am happy and proud to share. I was having my lunch at one of the hawker center and queuing up to buy food so I get my utensils ready (chopsticks and spoon). I don't usually check my utensils but somehow I did today. I realized there were some stains on the chopsticks and spoon so I took another set, thinking that the first set I took was not properly cleaned. I then realized that the second set also had similar stains and upon closed inspection, I discovered the stains were paints smeared from the markings made on the utensils to identify the ownership of the utensils. The paint marking on the utensil was probably not waterproof and could have smeared into different parts of the chopsticks and spoon through repeated washing. The scary thing is that the paint stains could be easily removed (by rubbing off with my finger), and this means that they could be consumed by customers when the chopsticks or spoon is mixed with food.

I tried to wash away the paint under a running tap but still it was not 100% clean. I started to think that the other customers could be unaware of this and consuming the paint together with their hot soup. I thought I had to inform the stallholder about this, not just because it was a nice thing to do but also it was the right thing to do. This is also being kind to many more customers as the queue for the stall was always there. However, I was hesitant initially because I was afraid of the reaction that I would get if I told the stallholder. Would I be labelled a busybody? How would he react? Would he be defensive? I know deep down inside me, I wanted very much to tell him. If it was because of losing face and keeping the truth to myself where I could help so many others, I would definitely regret my actions after I left the place. I decided I would tell the stallholder about this incident. If they choose to be defensive and do nothing about it, that is their problem and out of my control, I did what I should be doing.

I did not want to affect their business by openly raising this concern in front of all the queuing customers. So, I waited and waited but the queue was still there, even after 20 to 30 mins. As more and more customers bought from this stall, I became more affirmative about my decision because my action would really make a difference to all these customers. If there are 100 customers patronizing the stall each day and the issue had gone unnoticed for 1 month, there is a chance that 3000 customers could be consuming harmful paint as part of the food. Finally, there came a chance where the stall assistant walked over to the neighboring stall to exchange for some small change. I walked near him and waited for him to finish changing money and then told him that the paint marking on his utensil had smeared off. I told him I realized that when I was eating my lunch bought from his stall earlier. His response was very positive and he told me that he would take note and thanked me for informing him on that. I left the place feeling happy and proud because of what I have done; happy because I did something right and what I believe in, an act of random kindness that can make a difference to others, proud because I care more about others than myself.

The Starfish Story

Long before P.A.R.K. started, I have always been inspired by the starfish story (in the pic above). I remembered when I first started work 6 years ago, there was a section in my profile page (on the company's intranet) which I need to fill in some information about myself. I quoted the starfish story and ended with a concluding statement, "I aspire to be the starfish thrower who can make a difference to the people around me". Till today, I have yet to edit that section because I am still inspired by the starfish story and live by this philosophy that I can make a difference to someone, through acts of random kindness, one at a time.

There are millions of starfish (people waiting to receive our kindness) out there on the beach (in this world), we cannot save (help or be kind to) every one of them because we are not Superman. However, we can still make a difference to the starfish (one person at a time) that we are throwing into the ocean (one act of kindness) now.

Make a difference to that starfish today !

Want to do Good but Can't Find Time?

I believe many of us are in the same situation as this lady in the video. We want to do good, we want to volunteer our time and help the less fortunate, we want to do charity work but we can't find the time because time is always so limited. If we take away the time to work, sleep, catch up with friends and family, there is hardly any time left for ourselves to do the things we are very passionate about. While it is a challenge to balance so many tasks in life, the good news is that we can engage in acts of random kindness even if we have very limited time, because we can do it anytime, anywhere; be it at work, commuting, hanging out with loved ones or even at the comfort of our home. There are so many ways for us to be kind, we just need to embrace kindness in our heart and opportunities will present themselves.

The act of giving kindness is the same as doing charity work, both come from the heart with the intent of benefiting and bringing happiness to others. Doing charity work is one form of giving kindness, with beneficiaries being the needy and less fortunate members of our society. However, if we cannot afford the time to volunteer regularly, we can at least engage in acts of random kindness regularly because it doesn't take much time or effort to do one.

Kindness is the Universal Cure

We all have face many issues in life. From time to time, negative emotions like worries, anxiety and stress, arises from dealing with these issues, affect us and make us feel so unmotivated to do anything else but to fret over the issues we have.

However, if we can take a step back and choose to do acts of kindness, we can experience a paradigm shift whereby our attention is not sorely on the issues. We will feel less negative when our attention is not focused on the problem itself. When we reach out to others and understand their problems, we may feel that our issues are so insignificant as compared to theirs. When we live for a greater purpose in life to embrace kindness, we will feel less affected and stressed up by the demands of work or family commitment, which we know are secondary. If laughter is the best medicine, then kindness must be the universal cure.

PARKing in the Office

This afternoon, I went to the printer room to collect a print out and realized that it was not on the printer tray. I realized that there was an error saying the printer had ran out of paper. I would usually (out of convenience) open up the paper tray of another printer besides it and took a few pieces of paper to feed into the printer that I was printing from. By doing so, I could quickly collect my printouts (usually a few sheets) and get on with what I was doing. However, this action meant that the next guy (or the next next guy) coming to collect the printout would face similar problem as what I faced. Also, the printer besides this printer would have less paper, thus the scenario of that printer running out of paper would occur sooner than expected.

Therefore, I thought that there was an opportunity for me to engage in an act of kindness if I had helped to topped up the paper in the printer. I went to look for a new stack of blank paper and load an ample amount into the printer. I know this act will benefit at least a few others who are printing after me. Also, I thought it would be nice to replenish the blank paper supply in the printer besides it. Instead of taking blank paper from that printer out of convenience, I am topping up paper into that printer so that the scenario of that printer running out of paper would occur latter than expected. If someone has to be the one who topped up the blank paper supply, why can't it be me? It only takes a few person to engage in such random acts of kindness and the office will be happier place because the supply of paper is always sufficient.

There are many ways in which we can spread kindness in our workplace. Helping to guide a junior colleague along, sharing knowledge and experiences, greeting each other along the pathway, encouraging each other through difficult times at work are all acts of kindness that we can offer to our colleagues, whom we faced for most of the day. If we can cultivate a warm, pleasant and caring work environment, it is more likely that we will enjoy coming to office everyday. If someone has to take the lead to cultivate the kindness culture in the office, why can't it be you?

A Packet Of Rice (APOR)

This is definitely one project that inspires me a lot. A Packet Of Rice (APOR) is formed by a group of volunteers who fund together to purchase packed lunch for senior citizens residing in rented 1 or 2 rooms flats in Singapore. They are not part of any charity organizations or big companies, nor do they have a huge pool of charity funds available. However, APOR is able to continue organizing meaningful activities on a monthly basis, so that speaks volume about the community spirit and willingness of volunteers and donors to give something back to the society. With each distribution, the group brings in more volunteers to help out, which expands the circle of kindness and encourages more people to spread the love around.

APOR shows us that you need not be part of any established organization or be an influential figure to start something meaningful to help spread kindness around. APOR also shows us that to do good, you don't even need someone to pave the way for you. If you have an inspiring idea and plenty of enthusiasm, you can start up something to reach out and make a difference. This group of like-minded friends, who has the idea of reaching out to the elderly in Singapore, did exactly that and formed this meaningful project. They raise funds and recruit volunteers through the word of mouth on Facebook. With the funds gathered, they are able to provide regular distributions of packed meals and food items to the elderly, which will help these senior citizens considerably, especially when the cost of living is so high in Singapore.

For their outstanding and inspiring achievement, P.A.R.K. is proud to present APOR with the P.A.R.K. Star Award and hopes that APOR can continue to reach out to more elderly and inspire many more others to start their own projects in reaching out to those in need. It is through such acts of random kindness, that we can change the world to be a better place for all to live in.

Keep up the good work, Vincent & Team !

Donation to Wikipedia

Wikipedia is the first organization that I donated to that is outside the scope of charitable organizations. While Wikipedia may not be seen to helping any groups of beneficiaries through it's operation, it's mission and purpose are greatly aligned with that of PARK, which is to change the world through random acts of kindness. Wikipedia provides the platform for millions of kind volunteers to come together to share their knowledge so that millions or billions more people (now and in future) can benefit from the massive free source of information available. I am quite sure that most of us have benefited greatly by Wikipedia and this couldn't be possible if kind volunteers did not spend valuable time contributing valuable information online. It is a perfect example on how acts of random kindness, one at a time, can help change the world into a better place for all to live in.

Extract from Wikipedia on Wikipedia:
Wikipedia is a collaboratively edited, multilingual, free Internet encyclopedia supported by the non-profit Wikimedia Foundation. Wikipedia's 30 million articles in 287 languages, including over 4.3 million in the English Wikipedia, are written collaboratively by volunteers around the world. Almost all of its articles can be edited by anyone having access to the site. It is the largest and most popular general reference work on the Internet,ranking sixth globally among all websites on Alexa, and having an estimated 365 million readers worldwide.

Here's a reply mail from Wikipedia:

Dear PARK,

Thank you for donating to the Wikimedia Foundation. You are wonderful!

It's easy to ignore our fundraising banners, and I'm really glad you didn't. This is how Wikipedia pays its bills --- people like you giving us money, so we can keep the site freely available for everyone around the world. People tell me they donate to Wikipedia because they find it useful, and they trust it because even though it's not perfect, they know it's written for them. Wikipedia isn’t meant to advance somebody's PR agenda or push a particular ideology, or to persuade you to believe something that's not true. We aim to tell the truth, and we can do that because of you. The fact that you fund the site keeps us independent and able to deliver what you need and want from Wikipedia. Exactly as it should be.

You should know: your donation isn’t just covering your own costs. The average donor is paying for his or her own use of Wikipedia, plus the costs of hundreds of other people. Your donation keeps Wikipedia available for an ambitious kid in Bangalore who’s teaching herself computer programming. A middle-aged homemaker in Vienna who’s just been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. A novelist researching 1850s Britain. A 10-year-old in San Salvador who’s just discovered Carl Sagan.

On behalf of those people, and the half-billion other readers of Wikipedia and its sister sites and projects, I thank you for joining us in our effort to make the sum of all human knowledge available for everyone. Your donation makes the world a better place. Thank you.

Most people don't know Wikipedia's run by a non-profit. Please consider sharing this e-mail with a few of your friends to encourage them to donate too. And if you're interested, you should try adding some new information to Wikipedia. If you see a typo or other small mistake, please fix it, and if you find something missing, please add it. There are resources here that can help you get started. Don't worry about making a mistake: that's normal when people first start editing and if it happens, other Wikipedians will be happy to fix it for you.

I appreciate your trust in us, and I promise you we'll use your money well.

Thanks,
Sue Gardner

An Act of Kindness Goes A Long Way

When we show kindness to others, we may not remember the act but the recipient of our kindness may remember it for life. Looking back on my life, there were a few acts of kindness that happened quite some time ago but I remembered them vividly till today.

I grew up in a not-so-well-to-do family so my parents had to watch the expenses so as not to over commit on unnecessary wants. Therefore, overseas holiday trips, dinning out were considered luxuries and rarities for my family. I can remember that for the first 25 years of my life, my parents have only brought me one country, Thailand, for holidays. During the same period, I have no memories of my parents bringing me to any nice restaurants to dine. However, I do have many fond memories of my kind Auntie, who was running her own F&B business, bringing me out with her family to dine at some really nice Chinese restaurants. Each meals sometimes add up to $100+ or $200+, which is quite a lot of money considering it was at a time almost 20 years ago. Till today, I am still very grateful for such acts of kindness and generosity by my Auntie.

I have another Uncle who is an equally generous and giving person. He lives in a nice Terraced house and would always invite my cousins and myself to his house to play his children during the school holidays when we were younger. I could vividly remembered those days because it was packed with fun activities throughout during our stay at his house. There were lots of yummy food during breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper and the rest of the time was spent playing sports, computer games and watching movies with my cousins. It was comparable to spending the school holidays elsewhere in Disneyland. For that, I still very much appreciate all the kindness that my Uncle and his family have given me.

Another act of kindness which was memorable to me happened during my first tuition assignment when I was almost entering University. I remembered teaching an adorable primary school kid whose mom was really kind to offer me a bowl of soup (usually is ABC soup) after each tuition lesson. I had wanted to politely decline this offer so as not to impose on her but she would usually insisted that I finished the soup before I go. That act of kindness touched me because she is not related to me in any ways but still willing to offer something she thought was healthy and nutritious to me. I couldn't remember her name, her son's name or their faces, what subjects I taught but that act of kindness remained vividly in my mind.

Lastly, when I first started my undergraduate studies, I was really stressed up by the challenging modules but there was a friend of mine who was always willing to give me tuition for free and guide me along through that challenging phase. I dare say that without his guidance, I would have flunked my studies back then. Thereafter, I repaid his kindness by paying it forward, guiding my fellow peers and sharing my notes & mind-maps with them.

There are many more acts of kindness done to me by others but the above examples left deeper impression on me and I would always think about them once in a while.The marvel of a kindness act is that while it means nothing much to the giver, it means the world to the receiver.

If you look back on your life, there are bound to be acts of kindness that you appreciate deeply, be it from friends, family or even strangers. If we have been touched by these acts of random kindness before, it is time that we do acts of kindness on others that they can remember for life.

Inspirational Quote on Kindness

I would like to share with you guys this very inspiring quote from Leo Buscaglia.

“The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor. But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around. It's overwhelming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt.”
- Leo Buscaglia

My thoughts on the quote:

"The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor."

Indeed, the majority of nurses, social workers, caregivers and volunteers remain as unsung heroes because it is likely that not many people know of their kind acts. It is also likely that there is nothing created to recognize all the good work they have done, no ticker-tape parades or monuments.

"But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give."

Even if there is no recognition, no rewards or nothing in return, it does not stop these people from giving and impacting others' lives because there are so many people waiting to be touched by kindness. There will be people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique gifts and become happier because we made a difference to their lives.

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around." 

An act of random kindness can be so simple to fulfill and yet has a powerful effect on it's recipient. Such small acts of kindness can change the lives of others.

"It's overwhelming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt.”

And because it is so easy to engage in small acts of kindness, the opportunities are abundant everywhere. We just need to embrace kindness in us and opportunities will present themselves to us.

PARKing in a MRT Station

On my way home back home today, I entered a lift inside a MRT station. I was one of the first few to enter so I moved to press the lift button to the designated level. As the lift was reaching the platform level, I noticed that my train was coming. It could have been easy to exit the lift because I was standing near the door. However, I thought that it would be a kind gesture for me to press the "door open" button and allow all passengers to exit first, despite knowing I might miss my train. Most of the passengers who came out did not bother show any appreciation but I wasn't expecting any either. However, there was a lady, almost the last to leave the lift, who was very appreciative of my action. She was sincerely thanking me and even tried to use her hands to stop the door from closing when I was exiting the lift, as I was carrying my office bag and another plastic bag full of stuff. I felt good to be appreciated despite expecting nothing in return.

I feel that there are many opportunities present in our daily lives that allow us to engage in acts of kindness, even in the MRT station. We can be kind by queuing for our turn to board the train. We can be kind by moving in to the center of the train to allow more passengers to board. We can be kind by moving out first and not blocking the doorway if we are standing near the door, though it is not our stop to alight. We can be kind by giving up our seats (not necessary the reserved seats) to someone who needs it more than us. When there is an empty seat, we can be kind to see if there is anyone (someone older/ more frail/ pregnant/ young kids) who may need the seat more than us before taking the seat. When there are so many opportunities present, it is not difficult to engage in acts of random kindness on a regular basis.

P.A.R.K. Star Award Winners

Wouldn't it be nice to be doing something that you are really passionate about and at the same time spreading kindness to the community? Blogging is the answer if you are wondering how you can achieve both feats at the same time. Through blogging, useful knowledge can be shared among like-minded friends in the community, which can in turn inspire more people to share, especially when they have benefited previously from those who shared.

In this post, I would like to introduce to you two great blogs which have been around for quite awhile (since 2009 or earlier) and have a huge fan base. They are "A Singaporean Stockmarket Investor (ASSI)" and "My Wok Life".

ASSI is an investment blog in which the author, AK, is a humble and generous person who is ever willing to share his knowledge on investing and  his analysis of the stock market. There are many fans who made profits by learning from him. AK's kind nature can also be seen from the way he constantly encourages his readers to contribute back to the society by donating part of what they earn through investing to charitable organizations. He is also seen to be supporting a few charities regularly like "Singapore Children's Society" and meaningful initiatives like "BetterWorldBooks". AK epitomizes someone who is willing to share the good things in life with others and this is certainly a true act of kindness. By doing one act of kindness per blog entry, AK is making much difference to the community and spreading kindness to many beneficiaries.

Patrica, the author of "My Wok Life", is very passionate about cooking and has enriched many readers through her generous sharing of the recipes of many unique and delicious home cooked dishes. Patrica has spent much effort in making her recipes reader-friendly as well as including useful tips like where to get the ingredients, calories content of the dishes and their health benefits. Such acts of kindness can benefit greatly her readers. Despite her busy schedule of juggling work and family commitment, Patrica still finds time to cook daily for her family and blog on a consistent basis. This shows that when you are passionate about something, you will find time to do it, no matter how busy you may be. If we can all be passionate about our hobbies and sharing our knowledge with others, one step at a time, we are constantly spreading small act of random kindness around. When we embrace this thinking for life, we can really make a world of difference to people around us.

For their great initiative and selfless sharing, I am proud to present the P.AR.K. Star Award to both AK and Patricia. Please continue to keep the up good work and spread the kindness around.

What is your P.A.R.K. Moment?

One week into P.A.R.K., I would like to share some of my P.A.R.K. moments and hopefully it can inspire you to define your P.A.R.K moments and keep the ball rolling.

1. Yahoo Answers
Yahoo! Answers is a community-driven question-and-answer (Q&A) site launched by Yahoo! that allows users to both submit questions to be answered and answer questions asked by other users all over the world. I thought it is one of the most easiest way to reach out to those in need and to spread kindness around. Having lived through over three decades, I am sure some of my life experiences would help others in one way or another. I have answered questions with regards to tourism, education and volunteerism and will continue to contribute more in time to come. I feel good when my answer is voted as the "Best Answer". You really don't need a lot of time to participate in this act of kindness, a mere 5 mins of your time may make a lot of difference to the person in need of some kind advice or attention.

2. Giving up your seat to someone more needy
This PARK moment is even easier to achieve. It takes a mere few seconds to complete, doesn't require any brain power and opportunities are abundant in our everyday lives. In this week, I am proud to say that I gave up my seat on two separate occasions to two elderly aunties; one in a bus and the other at a bus-stop. I feel great to see the grateful look on their faces. Recently, there has been a debate on whether commuters should give up their seats to the more needy on public transport, especially if they had already paid for the fare and should enjoy the entitlement. However, if we have the heart to give, it really doesn't matter how much you paid for your fare or what you are entitled to, it is more of how you care for a fellow human being and being kind enough to give up your entitlement to make someone happy. Real generosity is doing something for others without wanting anything in return.

3. Making Donations
We often see students or volunteers participating in "Flag Day" events on the street, especially during the weekends. I personally have been through a few "Flag Day" events myself and it is not exactly an easy task for the volunteers. You need to sacrifice your personal time during the weekends to stand long hours in the open and take the initiative to ask from the public to donate for a good cause. Of all the people you approach, there is a high chance that more than half will shun you. However, one must keep the faith that the donations collected, no matter how small the amount, through collective efforts with the rest of the volunteers, can make a big difference to the beneficiaries. Therefore, if we cannot spare the time to participate in a such a volunteer activity, the very least we can do is to make a small donation to these volunteers and their beneficiaries. I donated 50 cents today, it is a very small amount and may only buy you a packet of tissue in Singapore. However, if there are 1 million Singaporeans like myself donating today, then the beneficiaries will be enriched with half a million dollars of donations. That is the spirit of P.A.R.K, through small and simple random acts of kindness one at a time, we can all make a BIG difference to the world.

There are many more examples of P.A.R.K. moments that I can think of and carry out. I will be sharing more with you in time to come. Hopefully, we can build a community where we are constantly sharing with each other our P.A.R.K moments, for life !

P.A.R.K. Facebook Page

If you are willing to board the A.R.K. with us and embrace P.A.R.K.'s life long philosophy, please "like" our Facebook Page and you will be updated with the latest blog entries, inspiring stories, quotes and pictures :)

The weblink to our Facebook Page is as follow:
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Project-Act-of-Random-Kindness-PARK/442100069242216

Also, I strongly encourage all P.A.R.K. members to share your P.A.R.K. moment on our Facebook page, to inspire more friends to join us in this amazing voyage.