Thursday, May 26, 2016

Making the Best Out of Comparison with Others

Why is everyone else living in EC & condos while I am stuck in my HDB flat? Why do all my friends own a car while I am still taking public transport? Why is my friend's hubby so sweet and always pampering her with gifts?
Humans love to compare, don't we? The revolution brought by smartphones and social media gives us more opportunities to do so, looking through the pics your friends shared and comparing what they have and you don't. It is perfectly fine to compare but if comparison makes you feel unhappy then you have to something about it.
I personally feel that we can make something good out of comparison with others. It should spur us to improve ourselves, achieve more and to bring more values to the people around us. We can learn through the people we compare ourselves with, because they are the perfect role models for us to reach a whole new level of excellence.
If we really can't achieve what your friends have achieved, e.g. one of your close friends is multi-millionaire, then instead of envy, be happy for him/ her for what he/ she has achieved. This is one way of shifting the focus from feeling inadequate, unhappy and dissatisfied to the positive feeling of sharing joy and wishing your friend well. I am sure you will feel happier if you think it that way.
Lastly, don't always compare with people who are better off than you. We also need to see the other side of the spectrum where there are so many people worse off than us, struggling with daily needs, like grocery, utilities bills or transport fares. These folks are very willing to swap positions with you. Happiness is a choice, that includes choosing to have positive and constructive thoughts, to lead a happy and fulfilling life.

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